Tips to get through to Christmas without losing your cool

It’s been a long year, after a long few years. Brittany Keogh goes in search of top tips for making it to Christmas with your wits about you.

Inflation hit 5.6%. Mortgage interest rates rose to a 15-year high. The All Blacks lost the Rugby World Cup. A major war’s kicked off and another continued. Cyclone Gabrielle lashed the North Island, killing 11 and destroying hundreds of homes. And to top it all off, the prime minister resigned ahead of the general election, adding an extra layer of complexity to the uncertainty that already comes with a change of government. It’s been a year filled with upheaval and the unexpected for many New Zealanders.

So it’s probably no surprise that as the end of 2023 nears, you might hear more people than usual admitting they’re worn out.

While it’s not uncommon for stressors and the feeling of being overwhelmed to build up throughout the year, the lifting of Covid-related-restrictions appears to have exacerbated the everyday pressures and strains Kiwis face, registered psychologist Sara Chatwin says.

“We have been getting back into the swing of what life looked like before Covid. I think people have rushed at that a bit because they’ve been very glad that they have been able to connect socially, get back into the workplace... And that can be a lot because we were lulled into a false sense of new normal during the pandemic, so that’s all changed up again.”

She describes burn out as “stress on steroids”. Multiple episodes of anxiety, overwhelm and/or stress are “wrapped together in a bit of a bundle and experienced over a protracted period of time”.

While there was light at the end of the tunnel with Christmas celebrations and, for most people, holidays coming up in a few weeks, many workers may have already hit a wall.

If that’s you, here are Chatwin’s top tips for getting through those final few weeks of mahi.

1. Have a plan

Christmas celebrations are often a special time to spend with loved ones, but they aren’t without stress. “My personal mantra as a psychologist is you can achieve anything in life with a plan,” Chatwin says. “With a plan and sense of direction comes a certain amount of confidence that you actually are going to get to the end of things and feel good about it.”

2. Get organised

Break your play down into attainable steps so you don’t get overwhelmed by everything. Chatwin recommends people arrange the logistics of festivities in advance – including where they’ll be, what they’re bringing and what prep they’ll need to do in advance.

3. Prioritise “me time”

It might be tempting to work overtime to clear your plate of everything on your to-do list and shoot off early for the holidays. But Chatwin warns against overexerting yourself, especially when you’re already feeling burnt out. Instead, prioritise taking some time to rest each week or even every day.

4. Hands off the devices

Social media can be full of comparison and judgment. So if you’re already feeling overwhelmed, it’s time to switch off.

5. Visit greenspace

Aotearoa’s natural environment is the envy of much of the developed world. Take some time to enjoy it as the weather gets warmer. That could mean spending a Sunday afternoon at the beach, taking a stroll through your neighbourhood in the evening after work, or even sitting in a park and reading a book during your lunchbreak.

6. Don’t worry if it all turns to custard (or collapses like an undercooked pavlova)

Like that trifle you tried (and failed) to replicate from Pinterest last year, even if you follow every step closely, the best laid plans can fall apart. Chatwin says it’s best just to go with the flow if things go pearshaped: “I think we need to take a bit of a mindshift from that very rushed, pressured kind of a perspective to a more reasonable approach of, hey listen I’ll make a plan and if it works that’s good, if it’s doesn’t that’s OK.”

Even once you’ve set your out-of-office and swapped your loafers for jandals (or some chic slides if you’re fashion-forward), keeping the pace slow and steady and embedding some of these practices into your regular routine over the holiday period can help ensure you get off the toxic hamster wheel of hustling until you’re burnt out for good.

Chatwin recommends that people ease themselves into 2024.

Although it’s helpful to have goals, they’re only achievable if you “walk the baby steps to get there”, she says.

To make your New Year’s resolutions attainable, set a little time aside each day in January and go back to that first step on the checklist – planning.

“It’s never that easy to just hit the New Year running and go boom, back to work, back to school and all the rest of it.”

If you’re sitting at your desk staring at your to-do list struggling to tackle any of it because you’re frozen with worry about getting it all done before the end of the year, (I can’t be the only one, right?) looking away from the screen and building a sculpture out of Blutac might help you figure out how to tackle it, Creative Waikato CEO Dr Jeremy Mayall says.

It might sound airy-fairy, but the research is clear: spending even just five minutes daily on a creative activity can serve as a much-needed mental reset in times of stress and uncertainty.

This idea is central to a new, free workplace wellbeing initiative by Creative Waikato.

Called Creativity Every Day, 30 Waikato-based artists, musicians and performers have come up with 20 activities to encourage creativity at work.

Drawing, sculpture, poetry, music, dancing, drama, doodling, acting, pencil rubbing and collage are some of the options participants can try out through the programme, supported through the Ministry of Culture and Heritage’s Regeneration Fund.

Mayall says the goal isn’t for everyone to become a talented artist. It’s “the process of engaging in the creative activity” that’s important, not the end product.

“It’s about building positive habits. So it’s having daily creative activity that you can engage in as a kind of circuit breaker.”